The government is worried that a no-deal Brexit will lead to a surge in dogging amongst the lorry driving community, when faced with monolithic tailbacks near the port of Dover.

If you’ve never heard of ‘dogging’ – it’s a slang term for public sex. Usually carried out in lay-bys, car parks and areas of woodland, there are hotspots all over the country. But one of the most common places is near the main Southern UK port.

It’s been estimated by the government in their Yellowhammer Report that there could be queues of up to 100 miles if we ever end up with a no-deal Brexit. This is mainly due to the importance of the channel crossing, allowing for foreign drivers access to and from the UK, as well as allowing UK drivers access to the continent.

However, because of the wait times faced by lorry drivers, the government is worried that this will lead to higher levels of voyeurism and illicit behaviour amongst hauliers, with lots of hotspots nearby the port potentially becoming unbelievably busy.

It was a Conservative minister who originally confessed this at a party conference recently stating, “one of the things we talk about in these no-deal meetings concerns hauliers and their activities”, “the main thing is whether they will turn up at the Channel ports with the right paperwork. But there are also dogging hotspots all over the place.”.

As of yet, the government has not announced any measures to reduce the threat of increased dogging activity, so it seems that Britain’s most secretive past time can maintain business as usual for the time being.